Saturday, September 20, 2008

I think I know what it feels like now....


To have Food poisoning!
Yesterday after work, I was taking Kyle over to his sisters to spend the night so that I could drive out to a dog trial on Saturday. I was running late, per as my usual, (Darci Standard time) and hadn't eaten anything yet that day and had told my daughter that I was getting hungry. Since I had decided not to leave Friday night to go to the trial, as I didn't want to drive after dark in unfamiliar territory, my directionally challenged self decided to just get up early on Saturday morning and drive out then instead. So my daughter asks that I stay for supper. Whats on the stove I ask. Pork chops, mashed potatoes, (the real ones, no boxed stuff) gravy, and corn, with warm brownies for desert. Ummmmm, do I even have to think about it?? YEA! I'm staying for supper! So in between playing with grand kids and the new pet chinchilla, I helped mash the taters and stir the gravy and before long, dinner is served. I was famished, and ate heartily. After supper, my daughter and I spent an hour or so just talking junk around the kitchen table and finished up the dishes and then I figured Id best get a move on towards the house. I still had some things to pack and get ready for my early trip out in the morning. So, Tam escorted me out to my truck, and it was then that I remembered that I needed to pick up some toilet paper on the way home, and mentioned it to Tam. Being the thoughtful daughter she saves me a stop and gets me a roll from her bathroom, and then we argue about whether I should pick Kyle up or will she bring him back home. Both, whining about time constraints and prices of diesel and gas for our respective vehicles. She ends up talking me out of a twenty, (damn expensive TP if ya ask me!) and says she will bring Kyle home on Sunday. So with hugs and waves, I drive away feeling full and content, and happy that I will be getting out to the trial for a weekend of fun. I cranked the tunes on the radio and sang my lungs out all the way home. I got home about 10:30pm and start to get things put together for the trip. I planed on getting up around 4am and be out of the house and on the road by
5am. You know, best laid plan and all. So I get to bed about midnight, and fall hard and fast asleep. Alarm is set for 4am and I look forward to sheep and dog dreams till it wakes me. I was feeling a bit queasy and light headed while getting my shower, but put it off as a full stomach and being tired. Id had a pretty full day at work, and it seemed that from the time Id awoke Friday morning till I was getting ready for bed Friday night, I hadn't had to much time throughout the day where I wasn't rushed in one form or another.
About 1:30am I was awakened, by a gut wrenching pain that made me sit straight up in the bed. Once I became fully awake, which didn't take long because my body was becoming awashed with agony, I felt the need to throw up. Easier said than done. It took awhile, but things finally started progressing, from both ends. You know, the old trick, sit on the toilet while holding the waste basket between your legs. Anyone that has had food poisoning knows this routine. I however have never had food poisoning, and it was the furthest thing from my mind at the moment. I didn't know what was wrong with me, and the cramps and pain in my stomach wasn't giving me much time to think about it. I woke DH with my whining and he got me a cold rag, and went back to bed. What a guy eh? Any way, after what felt like an eternity of sitting in the bathroom feeling like I was going to die, I hear my phone ringing. 2am and my phone is ringing?? OMG Some one must have died! Why else would the phone ring at that hour? Well, low and behold, no one has died, though I'm sure if the person on the other end of the line was feeling as I was at that moment, we'd both felt as if we'd have to die to feel better! It was my daughter, crying her eyeballs out, (she is such a drama queen) and telling me that she and Kyle are both sick as dogs and thank God she has two bathrooms in her house or he'd just be SOL and would have to go outside, because she isn't leaving her spot in the bathroom. OK. All three of us sick about the same time and with the same symptoms, I'm getting the picture now. Glad too, cause I was seriously thinking I was having an attack of appendicitis and was thinking it would probably be a good idea to visit the emergency room. Luckily, non of the babies ate any pork chops, as through our discussion in between puking and dry heaves, we had ascertained that those who didn't eat pork chops were happily sleeping like logs. With Tam crying like a baby I asked where her bro was at and asked to talk to him. Worst part about poor Kyle having gotten sick, was that he doesn't care to eat meat, especially meat with a bone in it. As Tam had cooked boneless chops, together we had talked him into having one. He ate about a half of one and that was better than nothing, and we felt we had attained our goal of getting the boy to eat some meat. I and Tam on the other hand, had had 2 chops each! Kyle was sick fer sure, and was letting me know under no uncertain terms now, that it was all my fault! OK, I can agree to let him vent, as it was our idea to have him eat what he had tried to turn down. At this point, I am very concerned as to what we should do in a case of food poisoning. Enter the computer. I wont go into detail, lets just say that I'm glad the phone cord reaches into the bathroom, cause I don't think I could have left there long enough to wait for dial up to do all that it has to do in the time it takes to do it to get the info I was looking for. Type in "Food poisoning, symptoms and cures. Wala! Do we all need to load up and meet at the ER or can we find ourselves some relief through a home remedy. What I found was that yes, it was most likely and very probable that we were suffering from food poisoning, no, the symptoms we were all showing wasn't enough to warrant a trip to the ER. At least not unless the symptoms escalated or some one passed out. Throughout the next several hours and even as I write this now, I still wonder if going wouldn't have proved the better idea, cause I still feel like warmed over shit, but I really didn't want to have to put any of us through that, being as we were all sooooo comfortable in our respective bathrooms. The web page I found and decided would be my food poisoning bible, said that we should take a table spoon of apple cider vinegar. Oh yea, like the boy who wont even eat meat is going to drink that!! It didn't sound very appealing to me either, but at that point, I was game even for a stomach pump! I called Tam back and yes, she did have some on hand. I read her the page I had on the computer, and told her what to do and call me back in half an hour. A couple of things the page had said would work to alleviate the cramps, one, apple cider vinegar, and the other. Charcoal. I remembered I had some charcoal, and I know your going to laugh, but dammit, I was in dire straights, I had some charcoal dog treats. Yes, I did. 2 tables spoons of apple cider vinegar, and 3 charcoal dog treats. I have to admit, the vinegar was a lot worse going down than the dog treats. Miraculously, within a half and hour, my stomach felt much better, not the greatest, but the cramps had subsided to a much lesser degree. Tam called back and I told her what I had done, taking the charcoal dog treats, and she said she had some too! I remembered I had bought some for her awhile back because she had complained that one of her dogs had real bad breath, and so I had gotten 2 for the price of one at Walmart, kept one box and told her to try the other on her bad breath dog. Luckily for us both, neither had tried them out on our dogs. I don't know if the amount of charcoal in them really helped all that much, but since eating them, I'm hoping it did, and that I hadn't eaten them and got my family to eat them if they didn't. She and Kyle had taken their vinegar, though it was no easy feat getting Kyle to take his, until another episode of puking and dry heaves convinced him otherwise, and he got it down, and was feeling a little better. They too had some and ate some charcoal dog treats, Kyle would only eat one, per what his sister told me, and I'm not convinced of it, but OK. Oh, and I'm not supposed to tell ANYONE!! The web page advised to take another dose of vinegar within 30 minuets of the first, so I told Tam, yer gonna have to take some more, and Kyle too. I could hear him in the back ground as she hollered from her bathroom to his and was shocked at the amount of strength he was able to muster at a protest. But it had to be done. Just think, if the first dose made such a difference, just think of how you;ll feel after the second!! It was the best I could do given the circumstances, and he wasn't in any position to argue, as it was that, or the ER. Not any of ours favorite place.
By 4am my alarm clock goes off. At this point, Ive been able to retire from from the bathroom for short intervals, and see that there is nothing on TV at that hour of the morning. I get up and turn the alarm clock off and try to lay down for a bit and get some rest. The phone wakes me back up at about 10:30am. It is my daughter, feeling sorry for herself and to let me know that Kyle is still alive, though not so well, and still feeling a bit nauseated, and shaky. I talked to him, and during the course of our short conversation, I am again hit with waves of nausea, slight cramps and my own shakiness. More cider?? No, I'll hold off and wait it out. Tam has arranged for her BF to bring Kyle home so that he may convalesce in the comfort of his own bathroom, and so I get up and attempt to make myself presentable for company. My head hurt to the point where I didn't even want to comb my hair! So, I didn't, and ask me if I cared. Kyle got home pale faced and as pitiful looking as I felt, and went straight to bed. He was still blaming me for insisting that he eat some pork chop against his better judgment. I must admit, it was the first time the child has walked in the house in years that he didn't make his first stop the fridge. After weakly thanking Tam's BF for bringing Kyle home and inquiring about her, I gladly shut the door in his face and retired to my own miserableness and bedroom. Ive slept on and off for most of the day and evening, and am feeling.....less sick at the moment. Both Kyle and I tried to split a can of chicken noodle soup this evening, but neither of us managed to get it all down. Still having bouts of nausea, but keeping down mostly water and what little chicken broth we sipped. I don't think I'll ever eat another pork chop as long as I live, and I doubt Kyle will ever eat meat of any kind ever again. As far as accepting any more invites to supper at my daughters, I'll take my chances at McDonalds thankyouverymuch. She says as she starts to turn green at the thought of food.

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